As many of us know, grief is a very difficult and painful process. Often we might do things to avoid grief, in hopes that it will go away. However, it doesn’t disappear unless it’s felt, and this doesn’t mean that you need to feel it all at once in order to “get over it”. It can be over time that sadness, and anger are released and you can find yourself in a better place.
In general, people are usually more willing to help if something has just happened, but over time, it gets more difficult for people to be there and provide support because everyone goes back to their daily lives. Often, we can be in shock and not be capable of reaching out during a time when we need to feel connections.
On another note, our culture often does not understand the grieving process, and may have unrealistic expectations about when our grief should end. Maybe certain people feel that after the first month, everything should be fine and we’re expected to be back on our feet again.
Often it can help to speak with someone you feel close to, and share what your feeling. People can turn to their loved ones but sometimes that’s not the case. This is where speaking with friends, a support group, or even seeking professional help like speaking to a therapist can be beneficially.
In an article that appeared in the Huffington Post, click here to read , it discusses how when grief is not shared, it can’t be released and unlike a wound, it’s not going to heal over time unless tended to. All sorts of symptoms can manifest from depression, to panic attacks and other somatic related complaints. Your thoughts may feel like molasses or on the other hand they could be racing, and your emotions may range from being overwhelmed to feeling shutdown. You may feel stuck, lethargic, and fatigued. These just some ways that grief can manifest, and it helps to be aware of what your feeling, and to share this with others so you don’t feel so alone. There is a tremendous amount of wisdom and compassion we can learn from sitting with great sadness. It’s in the very place of vulnerability that healing can happen and we can find peace.